Chapter Two: Books and Reading

Reading is the most intellectual and fun activity ever. Ever.

I was read to very often by my family, and as a result learned to read well very early, as well as developed a very deep appreciation for literature.

Reading books is the best thing you can do, folks.

ANYWAY -- How this applies to you...

As a good parent, you should let your kid read whatever the heck they get their hands on. If there's controversy surrounding a particular book, don't forbid them from reading it. Rather, suggest the books that actually ARE on the "Banned Books" list. Those are the best books around.

Especially Harry Potter.

I don't understand why so many people have a problem with these books... It's a very big source of frustration in my life, understanding the problem with Harry Potter. Because let's get one thing straight -- Harry Potter encourages friendship, love, understanding, courage, and truth. What better messages do you want your kids to get out of reading?!?!?!

Romanticizing domestic abuse? Encouraging too serious of a relationship for minors? Glittering vampires?? (*Cough* Twilight *Cough*)

I mean, c'mon, America. Seriously? First of all, Harry Potter is incredibly well-written, whereas Twilight is just complete crap. And I can say this, because being the educated person I am trying to be, I have read all books from both series.

So parents, never ban your kids from reading anything. Not even Stephen King. Unless it's Twilight. That piece of crap should be banned from everyone. Always. It is the only book I would ever petition to be banned ever. It's just a waste of time. And no kid should ever read it. WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY. It's complete bull.

Anyway...

Encourage your kids to read. But don't force it on them, because then they won't read. Trust me, the greatest thrill you will probably ever get is having to ground your kids from buying books and reading, like my parents did one summer. (True story.)

Your kids might not be good at sports, but really, in the grand scheme of things, who really cares? Odds are, they're not going to be the next Tiger Woods anyway (HEY-O!), and what it really comes down to is education. Would you rather have your kid be able to hold an intellectual conversation, or be able to run around a field? Think about college. In a truly good and just world, all people who are academic would get the big scholarships and opportunities, instead of the meatheads who are good at a sport and so they get a free ride. (It really bothers me...) Because when you go to school, you go because you want to further your education, not play soccer!!!!!

Anyway. Books are great. Here's a list of recommended books for your kids...

Kids age 0-5:

• Anything by Dr. Seuss
• Any of the "Little Critter" books by Mercer Mayer
• The Bernstein Bears
• Harry Potter
• Not Twilight

Kids age 6-11:

• The Boxcar Children
• Ramona Quimby
• Ralph S. Mouse
• Goosebumps
• Dear America
• American Girl books
• The Baby-Sitters Club
• Nancy Drew
• Harry Potter
• Not Twilight

Kids age 12-14:

• Peter Pan
• Stargirl
• Maniac Magee
• Number the Stars
• Harry Potter
• Not Twilight

Kids age 15+:

• The Lord of the Rings
• Siddhartha
• Brave New World
• 1984
• Anything by Charles Dickens, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Jane Austen, Khaled Housseini, and Stephen King
• Night
• The Bell Jar
• The Princess Diaries
• The Princess Bride
• Johnny Got His Gun
• Everything is Illuminated
• Wicked
• The Scarlet Letter
• Harry Potter
• Not Twilight